Specifically, why is it that FAAB trans people can't/shouldn't reclaim the T word? I as a FAAB trans person have no desire to reclaim it, but it has been used against me. My point isn't even that people who've had the T word used against them should be able to reclaim it, as I'll expound on later. It's just -
My lesbian mother uses the word 'faggot.' When I asked her why, she said it was to be volatile - to push queer sexuality right into people's faces, that she realizes that there is nothing so societally transgressive as a feminine man and she uses that slur to draw on its transgressive nature. It bothers the hell out of me when the T word is used by anyone without respect for its equal, even greater volatility.
When people, especially people my age, and especially FAAB trans people joke about being a tranny or a faggot, I get some serious rage going on; that's why I don't want to use those words for myself, because I as a young person and a person read as female have never ever experienced the kind of prejudice and hate that goes along with those words.
Nonetheless, I believe strongly that volatile words can be weapons. I have autism, and I've used the R-word when people are pushing me to do things that will soon cause me to melt down, and I've tried more polite ways to get them to stop which have all failed. When I say something like "I can't do that, I'm autistic, I'm retarded," they often back off.
Anyway, I'm sorry this got so long (I could have gone on, hah,) but, um, thanks for reading. I really do want answers. If everyone believes that something is offensive but me, I can assume that they're all wrong or that I am, and the second one makes more sense. colloquialfeeling-deactivated20